Fibromyalgia and the Holidays

One holiday down, Thanksgiving, and the holiday season is off to a start. The time of year when we use the most spoons. You can't go to the store and get more, you just have to keep the ones you have and reuse them daily.  I used to have a reserve set. You know, when you dig deep in the drawer and there are just enough or even a few to spare, maybe for dessert or an unexpected dish after you have thrown the other spoons into the dishwater. Maybe for that midnight piece of cheesecake your significant other put away just for you.

Now, I am forced to use only the fine silver. The kind you guard like they are made of pure gold! Each one is reserved for only the most special delicacies. But what about those surprises listed above? They still show up, and I have run out of silver polish! All of the local stores are out and Amazon is offline. No one knows when they will come back online. So I am stuck. I have no spoons for days...maybe even weeks. This doesn't stop the holidays from coming. What am I to do? Anxiety is setting in. What if they don't have any available by this weekend? How am I going to serve extended family dinner as scheduled? I can't go to that sweet dance recital on an empty stomach. I might faint! Oh my God!! What if the silver polish company goes out of business? How am I ever going to get my precious silver usable? I just stare at it every day, not being able to pick it up and capitalize on it's functionality.

Last night I dreamed I was in a foreign land. I was eating a chocolate covered vanilla ice cream sundae. When I was done, I tossed the plastic spoon into the bin as if it was a nuisance and I was back to enjoying my vacation. I woke up.

Maybe I will get lucky and I'll get some polish tomorrow. Until then, I'll just sit and wonder if I will be able to eat tomorrow.

 

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